A pleasant chit chat moment on Sunday with a new friend prompted me to post this blog today. This blog will have some really wacky moments and some obscene
questions that were asked of me or overheard from conversations around me pertaining to my newly acquired ability: Living with Blindness
* These experiences are as real as they can get, sharing them with you just for laughs. Please don't conclude me as an evil person.
Q. How do you brush your teeth?
My Wacked Response (MWR): I usually use the toilet brush with the right amount of harpic
Q. How do you shower?
MWR: I usually wait till it rains
Q. How do you go to the toilet?
MWR: Standing on one foot helps, you should try it!
Q. Do you have s*x? If yes, how do you?...
MWR: I don't get lucky everyday. I start with saying hello lady, followed by a handshake and some intellegent conversation. If things go well, then we
head to her place or mine...
Q. Why do you need a TV, you can't see!
MWR: I need a place to put the flowers and besides it matches with the curtains.
Q. How do you travel?
MWR: Ever since I lost contact with the mothership I am forced to use public transport or hitch hike
Q. Who combs your hair? Dresses you up?
MWR: The comb and my little sister in that respective order
Q. How do you shave?
MWR: My family doctor helps me with that
Q. Do you have any children?
MWR: Not that I know of
Q. Are you afraid of the dark?
MWR: Uff! Can that question get any smarter?
Some funny incidents:
In the bus on my way back home from work: Girl enters the bus and greets with a loud Hello. I respond back with a Hello. Girl upset and curses and tells
me that she is on the phone and that hello was not for me. Me is heart broken :(
At the movie theater: Blind mann over hears gossip; What is he doing here, he can't see! My sincere response: I am here to check upon the pop corn vendor,
I am the official pop corn taster for this theatre :)
At a book store (well more than a book store, Landmark): Excuse me, are you staff? Yes, How can I help you? Do you have any books I can read? Staff disappears
and does not come back. FYI: This place has audio books.
In the mens room of a famous pub in the city: Hey you are a blind man! Me: Yes, you be correct! So where is your wheelchair?
##$*#$$
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Great jokes. Being VI does have it's advantages.
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